Whenever in doubt the first thing I do is ASK LUX. Here are some of my questions to Lux.

On Knowledge 

Me: So, now that I'm graduating, my school is offering me a scholarship for a master in science. The thing is I don't really want a master in science nor do I want a master from my shitty school. I wanted an MBA or maybe a master in science but not from my school. But then again they are giving me the scholarship so I thought might as well do the program in my school and then do another one in another university, What do you think lux? 

 

cuervo@lux:~$ fortune
You see, I consider that a man's brain originally is like a little empty
attic, and you have to stock it with such furniture as you choose.  A fool
takes in all the lumber of every sort he comes across, so that the knowledge
which might be useful to him gets crowded out, or at best is jumbled up with
a lot of other things, so that he has difficulty in laying his hands upon it.
Now the skillful workman is very careful indeed as to what he takes into his
brain-attic.  He will have nothing but the tools which may help him in doing
his work, but of these he has a large assortment, and all in the most perfect
order.  It is a mistake to think that that little room has elastic walls and
can distend to any extent.  Depend upon it there comes a time when for every
addition of knowledge you forget something that you knew before.  It is of
the highest importance, therefore, not to have useless facts elbowing out
the useful ones.

 

Me: Brilliant, Ill send them to hell. 

 

On Marriage 

Me: So I'm really into my current relationship and I was actually thinking of getting married what do you think lux?

 

cuervo@lux:~$ fortune
You will be divorced within a year.

 

Me: Ok, lets wait then. 

 

Problems at school

Me: So Ive been having problems with this teacher of mine, mostly because he doesn't really care about his students and just plainly ignores us and I'm trying to figure out a way to expose him against his superiors but I don't think that's a good argument to expose him, what do you think I should do lux?

 

cuervo@lux:~$ fortune
Write yourself a threatening letter and pen a defiant reply.

On Sloth

Me: Ive always had a lot of problems waking up in the morning, I usually end up hating myself for waking up so early, I must confess I tend to be very lazy, what do you think I should do lux?

 

cuervo@lux:~$ fortune
Don't hate yourself in the morning -- sleep till noon.

 

On Jobs

Me: So I have been a bit lazy as far as looking for a job goes, there's always the chance to just go into the family business but I find that less than exciting, so what do you think I should do if I don't really have a lot of opportunities out there?

 

cuervo@lux:~$ fortune
You can create your own opportunities this week.  Blackmail a senior executive.

 

More Problems at School

Me: So, that teacher I was having problems is now whining about how I'm a bad student without any real arguments. The worst part is he isn't really saying anything bad, but still he is whining and whining about it with my counselor. Should I get worried?

 

cuervo@lux:~$ fortune

Noise proves nothing.  Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles
as if she laid an asteroid.
                -- Mark Twain

 

On Inspiration

Me: So, I'm supposed to write a book but I don't really know what to write about. What do you think I should write about lux?

 

cuervo@lux:~$ fortune
Writing is turning one's worst moments into money.
                -- J.P. Donleavy

 

On Nakedness

Me: So this guy went to Mexico City recently to photograph thousands of naked people for what he claims to be art. He is famous for photographing random naked people by the thousands around the world, but many say that's not art at all. What do you think about it?

 

cuervo@lux:~$ fortune
Clothes make the man.  Naked people have little or no influence on society.
                -- Mark Twain

 

On Love

Me: So lux, Ive realized that having my girlfriend in another country has made me rather lonely, and its been in those deep times on loneliness that Ive turned to you. You have always been there for me, I'm starting to realize that I can't live without you.

 

 cuervo@lux:~$ fortune
You're not my type.  For that matter, you're not even my species!!!